outcast

Ever feel like you are the outcast? I hate that feeling and right now it is all I feel!
It is really scary how much things can chang over a few months! I feel like I dont belong in this place. I feel like I should give it more time, part of me just wants to leave though and act like it never happened! I know nothing is going to be the same but I just didnt think I had been gone for that long or have drifted that far away. I am completely disconnected. I don't know. I just want to walk out, all of it is just way to hard. I honestly thought I was ready to handle it but I'm not. I feel like going back into a little dark corner where no one can hurt me. I guess you can call me a quitter cause I always leave when things like this happen. I wish for once I would be able to stand strong and not move, but I'm not to that point yet.
I am just not strong enough ...