my new life :)

So I have changed a lot. Some people say for the worst ... I dont agree with that. I mean yeah mabey I have picked up some things I shouldn't have, but honestly, I dont care! I am so happy with life right now. Yeah there are those few bumps but who doesnt have those? I'm not going to lie it was extreamly hard to leave everyone behind and I miss everyone who lives in Birmingham, and I wish I could get back there more offten then I do, but my work keeps me tied up! I didnt want to move but I needed the change! I can honestly say "I'm happy!"

This is my boyfriend Ben. We have been together for 5 months. He is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. We have our bumps in the relationship but we always push through them. He keeps me strong and supports me in whatever I choose to do. He treats me well and is always a gentlemen. He is good with my family and treats them with respect even though I have an issue with doing the same. He listens to me and always helps me figure out my problems and always comforts me when I need it. He does a lot of little things for me that just make me smile. He is here for me whenever I need him and is my best friend! I am so glad I met him. I couldn't ask for anyone better! I would do anything for him. You mean the world to me! I love you so much Ben!
This is my friend Caroline. We have some crazy times together. We can trust eachother with anything. She cheers me up when I need it and is there for me no metter what. She supports me in most things I do. She gets excited about everything.. I am always smiling with her. She doesnt judge people, and always gives them a chance. She has gone through so much and stayed so strong. I look up to her so much. She inspires me and has so much knowledge. I know I can go to her for anything I need. She will take me in any time I need it. I don't know what I would do without this girl. She is such an awesome person. I love all our inside jokes! I love you dime whore!

This is Matt! He is an awesome person. He loves cars and his girlfriend. That is what he is always talking about, but I dont mind. He loves driving fast, blaring music, and drifting in his '95 Mustang. He is a chill person for the most part, till he gets hyper or is trying to cheer someone up then he gets crazy! He is always here for me. He is an easy person to talk to. He is willing to listen and give you advice whenever you need it. He is not one of those people that jsut gives you advice but he makes sure you hear it and understand! He has been though a lot of shit and continues to stay stong and just be himself. He doesnt care about yor past. He wont judge you and gives second chances. He is one of my best friends! He is such a sweet guy. You always have me laughing! Love ya Matt!

This is Jacques. He is another one of my best friends. He is from England and in the U.S. army. He is a violent person but he teaches you how to defend yourself. You never really see him crazy, he doesnt get hyper very much like Matt or Caroline. He is extreamly protective wheather he will say he is or not. He is always there to comfort me and give me advice. He is very truthful and will tell you what he thinks, even if you dont want to hear it. You never know what to expect out of him. He is one of those people you will never be able to figure out no matter how well you know him. He is a caring guy that doesnt show it but you know he does! He takes a while to get use to but after you get to know him he is really a kind guy! You are always here for me and have me smiling and always teaching me new ways to defend myself! I love you Silly Whore!

This is my new life in Atlanta! I love my new friends they have been here for me so much allready and I know I have only known them for a few months but it feels like I have known them longer. I dont think I could live if I didn't meet these people. They mean so much to me allready. We have some insane moments but they make every moment of my time over here in Atlanta worth it! I love them!

masks

I am tired of wearing these masks!
I am tired of other people wearing masks!
If only it was easy to take off the mask.
There are the guys wearing the masks to impress the girls,
the person wearing the mask that make them look tough so people wont see how much their past hurt them,
the girls wearing the masks that are covered in jewls to hide how they really feel about the way they look,
the person wearing the mask with the smile to hide how torn up they really are inside.
It seems now a days everyone has a mask they wear, if not many.
The problem is though, when someone takes off their mask, everyone freaks out, so they quickly turn around and put there masks back on.
If everyone could just be themselves.
If everyone could except everyone for who they are.
Of course, that could never happen in this world.

2009

Life in '09 is great!

I feel so much better with myself, and I know this year holds a lot for me.

My new town is awesome. Well for the most part. I think everyone around here is to serious. Which you all know I hate being serious all the time.

My new school is cool. It has over 3,000 kids in it, which is double the size of Spain Park. Being late isnt a big deal here. You always see peopole just walking in the hall after the bell rings, and the teachers dont even care! I dont mind though!

I cant wait to go back to Birmingham and visit in like 2 weeks! I have so many people that i have to see! I miss everyone from there! I cant wait to go to the 220! Its going to be awesome to see my family again!

Were we ever friends?

I thought you were my best friend!
I don't even know what to think anymore.
I can't tell if you were really being the real you around me or being the fake you.
The person you are when no one is around is who you really are.
You don't have to lie to me about were you are, hell you don't even have to tell me, but if I ask, don't give me some bull shit about your not feeling well and going home and your not with that person when you really are! A little advice, try asking that person to be quiet, that way when you TRY and lie to me that your not with them, I don't hear them in the fucking background!!
I only have a few days here. I cancelled plans to spend time with you, because you told me to! Then you are cancelling on me to hang out with the same damn people you see everyday! On top of that you know I need you more then ever right now! I thought best friends were there for eachother! I am so glad to see how much our friendship means to you! Where we even friends, or did I become friends with someone who doesn't exist?

Atlanta

So I am all moved over to Atlanta. Today was my first day at work. It went really well. my tech students make me laug so hard, and my younger students are so cute and none of them are brats, that always makes things a little bit easier. I think I can finally say I am content with where I am in life, as far as work and where I live. There is only one thing I really need to correct in my life and I know I can do it, it will just take a while, but I know it will happen. I have only been gone for like 5 days and I allready miss the people from Alabama! I mean I just got back into church and finally felt accepted again and all the sudden I had to pick up and leave. I hope we don't lose touch and things end up the way we use to be. I get to see most of them on new years so that will be fun! Julie gets married Friday and I am super excited. He is a cool dude and treats her well and I am happy that she found someone like him. It is a winter themed wedding, of course! It will be soo pretty!! I am also in love with the dress I have to wear! Life is good right now! Everything is calm and peaceful. My life hasn't been like this in a while. I can honelsy say the smile on my face isn't a mask anymore

:)

racing against the clock

When am I going to get a break?!?
I am just in this mode where I keep going and going an I can't stop!
My mind is every where and I have so much to do but not enough time! I am getting this awesome oppertunity in Atlanta but I didn't realize it would all happen this fast. Now I feel like I am racing against the clock to get moved over there! I am so stressed. I can't handle this. I am finally starting to get up off the ground when all the sudden I just don't have the strength to get up anymore. I just want to lay back down. I thought I could do all this, but it is pretty clear that I can't! Someone help! I am so tired!

who are you?

Who are you?
What happened?
You use to be this person that was so loving and caring.
You use to be the person that stood up for themselves and didn't give in to peer presure.
You use to be the person who didn't care about what other people think.
I miss you.
It's sad when the people you know, become the people you knew.